Shyness and humility

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A seeker wrote, ‘Is it fine not to do the acts of notoriety due to shyness (hiya)? Especially, if a senior orders, like wearing a cloak (bisht) on Eid. My father and aunt force me to do so and become upset (if I do not). Whereas, for me due to shyness this is burdensome. I can not raise my eyes (if I do this).

Hakim al Umma Maulana Ashraf Ali Thanvi (Allah have mercy on him) relied,
‘Leave them when there is constriction in the heart (qalb).
If seniors order then excuse yourself politely.
If they insist then act as they say. It will be a spiritual struggle (mujahida).

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Seeker continued, ‘Should the wearing of a turban, especially on Jumma and Eid be abandoned due to shyness? Now I do find the courage to give preference to shyness and abandon a Sunna.

Hakim al Umma (Allah have mercy on him) replied,
‘This is not a a intended (maqsuda) Sunna.
When on the other hand is Sunna of humility (tawadhu). Some of its (humility’s) components are obligatory (wajib). Therefore, the quality of being intended (maqsudiyet) is more in humility then in wearing a turban.’

Tarbiyet us Salik, volume 3, page 103

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