Tarbiyet: A wife’s complaint

A wife wrote a letter complaining that in spite of taking very good care of her monetarily and physically her husband’s attitude is dry, rough and non affectionate with her. She cited many examples of his curt, blunt and hurtful replies and behavior.

Sayyidi wa sanadi
Mawlana Mohammad Taqi Usmani (may Allah preserve him) had the husband read the letter (when he visited) in front of him and asked for an explanation.

The husband acknowledged his behavior and tried to make some genuine excuses, like financial stresses, psychological illness, unrealistic demands by the spouse and pressures at work.

Very gently Hadhrat advised him,

‘Her complaint is genuine. Remember that for a successful marital relationship extra effort has to be made.  Try your best.  The enviornment at home should be that of affection, gentleness and happiness.’

At the same time Hadhrat reassured the wife in writing that he has instructed her husband on these issues and she should be patient and undemanding.

A few days later Hadhrat inquired the husband regarding the status of this issue.

Malfuzat e Ramadhan 1429

IDSA, Washington DC