Category Archives: H. Whispering & random thoughts

wasawis and khatrat

The struggle

A seeker wrote,

This is something that I wanted to write about for a while. I am continuing to struggle with dirty thoughts. Many thanks to Allah SWT that controlling the gaze has improved a lot.

Ashrafiya replied,
MashaAllah. May Allah give strength in your determination and make it practical for you to use your will power to stop this activity.

Make dua a lot for Allah SWT’s help in this regards.

Fix penalty for each mistake. Like 4 nafil rakat or skipping a meal.

After each namaz for one minute close your eyes and imagine ,”I’m in front of Allah and He is watching me.” A pratical way is to recite this sentence 33 times in your imagination. It will be approximately 1 minute duration.

I am also making dua especially in this regards.

Also, it will be advisable to increase the intimacy with your spouse.

Islahi emails:TA

Involvement in Islamic Associations

A seeker wrote,

I wish to inquire about involvement in the local Islamic association. As I mentioned earlier the local association in our split into two groups due to internal differences. Unfortunately egos were flying high on both sides and a lot of actions were done in the ‘zid’ of the other party. e.g. One side opened up a musalla and the other bought a house for mosque purpose 1km away. The two sides were also planning to conduct taraweeh literally across the street from each other (which is sad since the resources could have been allocated to help out muslims on other parts of the city). Alhamdulillah a member of our community worked very hard to unite them and convince for one taraweeh salat during this blessed month. I was helping him out too.

I have noticed that in these situations, conflicts, politics, argumentation and other negative characters do arise (even if you try your best to steer away, people will oppose). But on the other hand I feel that if one leaves this completely either things won’t be done or others will get things done their way.

Please suggest a course of action.

Ashrafiya replied,

It is best to keep a low profile.

This does not mean to be totally passive. The correct view/truth should be stated in a firm and explicit way. One should personally stick to it. If people ask his opinion specifically he should tell it point blank.

However, this should not become an agitation movement. This ruins ones spirituality. Instead one should make lot of dua, salat hajjat, etc. for haqq to prevail.

Continue with your present way. Make lot of dua asking Allah for guidance at each and every step. (A concise istekhara dua is: Allahahuma khirli wakhtarli).

However, whenever you feel that this involvement is damaging your spirituality withdraw and help by dua only.

Islahi emails:TA

Excuses

A seeker wrote, I wish to get more detail on one of the reasons “making explanations for one’s mistakes”. Does this refer to explanation in islahi makatib? e.g. if the salik explains why he thinks a certain shortcoming is occurring.
Please explain.

Ashrafiya replied,
Blame worthy thing is to create an excuse for one’s mistake. The mistakes should be acknowledged and full responsibilty taken. If there are genuine circumstance that led to it they can be mentioned as a matter of fact. The same is true for islahi corrspondence also.

Islahi emails:TA

Earning more to spend more

A seeker wrote,

One thought that comes to my mind is that when you have more money you can give more too for the betterment of humanity and muslims in particular. Please comment.

Ashrafiya replied,

Not necessarily. Many become more miserly and some waste their money on haram.

Reviewed and approved by sanadi wa sanadi Mufti Mohammed Taqi Usmani (Allah protect & preserve him)

Envy

A seeker wrote,

I feel that I have envy against the religious groups that are flourishing but are not correct according to our ideology. I have discussed this earlier but since I read the topic on Hasad I realized that its perhaps hasad (so I thought I should mention it again). e.g. If I hear about a certain group having a big conference in which many poeple showed up. I will have a feeling wishing that these people don’t show up in such numbers.

Ashrafiya replied,

Make excessive dua for them after each salah and admonish yourself for having these thoughts.

Islahi emails:TA

Reviewed and approved by sanadi wa sanadi Mufti Mohammed Taqi Usmani (Allah protect & preserve him)

Anger

I wish to understand the limits of anger. I, like typical people find myself angry at wife and friends, at times. I have noticed that you need some degree of anger to keep the order intact. I will try to explain with an example. Before my wife and I used to be routinely late. If we had told someone that we will get there by 2pm, we would be like 2 hours late. Many times we couldn’t get things done because of being late. I had to display anger at my wife many times to tell her that this is something unacceptable and Alhamdulillah things improved a lot. There is one thing though, I used to (may Allah SWT have mercy on me and my wife) shout at my wife before. Overtime Allah SWT gave me the
realization that there are other more civilized ways of demonstrating anger. Now I just try to state my purpose in a firm (not loud) tone and try to appear upset. Please suggest the right behaviour with respect to anger. Is it just
for establishing deen. How about establishing an order in your life.
e.g. I was listening our Hazrat db’s lecture in which he mentioned an incident where Hakeem ul ummah RA got upset at someone using the toilet’s slipper to get into the masjid. Now this act is perhaps not sinful in Islamic terms but Hazrat RA wanted to maintain an order in his khanqah. Please help me understand the purpose and bounds of halal anger.

Ashrafiya replied,

No anger is halal for inept like us.
Anger is a sign of kibr for us.
It should be avoided all together.

For maintaining order be firm and clear but polite. Do not be angry. Recite auzobillah, drink cold water and think about Allah’s hilm on one’s self in spite of all the misbehavios. Condone others short coming. Remind yourself that you are not there to do islah of others.

Islahi emails:TA

Reviewed and approved by sanadi wa sanadi Mufti Mohammed Taqi Usmani (Allah protect & preserve him)

Hearing yourself being praised

I thing I like being praised by others. I get a feeling that I tend to do things so that I am praised. When I am actually praised by others (beshuk tamam tareef sirf Allah SWT ke liye he) it gives me a sense of satisfaction (not sure if its satisfaction or pride) but it does motivate me to do more. And definitely I get an un-easy feeling. But overall I feel that I get a feeling of pride in me. Please suggest a course of action.

Ashrafiya replied,


It is quite natural to feel like this. This is unintentional and so not blame worthy in itself. However, if left unchecked it may lead to ujub and kibr. So at these occasions one should thank Allah that the people only observed and reported the good things about me and Allah hid my reality, mistakes and sins from them by his karam and sattari. Moreover when the marifa is achieved and one comes to realize his actual state this praise will feel like a joke and a mocking.

Islahi emails:TA

Reviewed and approved by sanadi wa sanadi Mufti Mohammed Taqi Usmani (Allah protect & preserve him)

Inquisitiveness

A seeker wrote,
I really want to hear things about other people. Although I tell others not to tell me but somewhere inside I want to hear it (the exact disease that is mentioned in the book).

Ashrafiya replied,

Being an unintentional desire this is not a disease by itself until some thing extra ordinary and sinful is done to achieve this.Consider it to be wrong and sinful desire and remind yourself of its uselessness.

Islahi emails:TA

Reviewed and approved by sanadi wa sanadi Mufti Mohammed Taqi Usmani (Allah protect & preserve him)

Mental Backbiting

A seeker wrote,

Can you please explain the details about “Dil se gheebat”. How to diagnose it and how to cure it if its present. A lot of the times the thoughts come to mind. I thought just keeping them to yourself and not saying to others is fine. But by this term it seems like even the thoughts are wrong.

Ashrafiya replied,

This is to intentionally think bad about some one. That is, things if he was to be informed of it he will be upset.
It is an intentional action and remedy is to use one’s determination (himmat) not to do it.
Also, one should develop this habit that on this thoughts one should intentionally think and remind himself of being the most lowly creature on the face of the earth. And admonish one’s self of doing this gheebat and make dua for that individual.

Islahi emails:TA

Reviewed and approved by sanadi wa sanadi Mufti Mohammed Taqi Usmani (Allah protect & preserve him)

Exposing the shameful

A seeker wrote,

It has been a month since I wrote a proper letter, was really feeling the need. I have started to write down instances where I feel some negative traits were demonstrated by me. Especially when I am reading the prescribed readings I write down all the questions (‘ashkalat’) right away. I feel really ashamed to be writing some of the things below but I have learned from the Ashrafiya blog that one has to be very open in describing all ailments to the Shaykh.

Ashrafiya replied,

There is no reason for concern. Many times we have to tell the physician things that are embarrassing. However, we recognize that it is important to achieve cure and healthy state.

Islahi emails:TA

Reviewed and approved by sanadi wa sanadi Mufti Mohammed Taqi Usmani (Allah protect & preserve him)

Polemics

– I wish to ask about polemical debate. As our elders stress a lot about the harms of debating and you can also feel a sudden negative effect after debating with someone even though you feel you were on haq. Should one completely abstrain from discussing anything at all. Normally a debate starts off as a simple innocent conversation. I used to think the point at which one should pull out from the debate is when arguments begin to repeat. But now I feel that by that time the spiritual harm is already done. What should be the course of action in this.
e.g. In my community, our Islamic organization split into two groups. As I understand both sides have respectable people and no one is completely wrong. There were weaknesses on both sides. Today at prayer someone started taking the side of one of the groups and criticizing the other. I tried to explain the point of view of the other side but it turned into a debate and I still feel the negative effect on my heart.
Should one completely stay out of controversial issues even though you feel you have a valid point and you should convey it to the other person.

Ashrafiya replied,

Indeed. Involvement in polemical debates is always spiritually detrimental. There are many reasons for it, including,1. it directs one’s attention from Allah2. one tries to defend his opinion and nafsaniyet comes in3. specially for people like us, blameworthy character traits like, anger, hasad, arrogance, etc. come into play. and many others. All of them cause this negative effect on one’s heart. It is best to avoid it upfront. Moreover, if one is stable enough to control his nafs (beyond our status) the negativity of other’s heart is reflected and carried over to his own heart ruining it’s serenity.

Islahi emails:TA

Reviewed and approved by sanadi wa sanadi Mufti Mohammed Taqi Usmani (Allah protect & preserve him)

Nuqus o kamal

A seeker wrote,


Alhamdulillah the I am trying to act on the Faraidh and Mamoolat. Waise sacchi baat tau ye he ke band eke a’amaal intihai naqis hain, Allah SWT ma’af farmaaen.

Ashrafiya replied,

MashaAllah. apnay a’mal kay nuqus ka ahsas kamal aur kamyabi ki tarf safar ki a’lamet hay. Jaisa bun pa raha hay us pay shukr aur kotahi par istegfar kartey rahna hay.

Islahi emails:TA

Reviewed and approved by sanadi wa sanadi Mufti Mohammed Taqi Usmani (Allah protect & preserve him)

Listening to many bayan

A novice seeker wrote, I noticed a new link being added to Ashrafiya website. Would it be recommended for me to listen to these lectures?

Ashrafiya replied,
No.
Each Shaykh has his own disposition and style of approaching islah. Mixing to many styles leads to confusion. The mawaiz of Hazrat Hakim Akhtar (Allah have mercy on him) and our Shaikh Mufti Mohammed Taqi Usmani (Allah protect & preserve him) are quite enough and beneficial, inshaAllah.

Islahi emails: TA

Reviewed and approved by sanadi wa sanadi Mufti Mohammed Taqi Usmani (Allah protect & preserve him)

Khushu in Salah

A seeker wrote,
– I try to focus on the words and meanings in Salah but the train of thought derails very frequently. Please recommend something in this regard.

Ashrafiya replied,

No problem at all.
Invoulantary derailment does not cause damage to khushu.
Whenever, you recognize the derailment come back on the track.
InshaAllah, with persisitence and practice the frequency of this will decrease.

Islahi emails:TA

Reviewed and approved by sanadi wa sanadi Mufti Mohammed Taqi Usmani (Allah protect & preserve him)